More challenging words...

"Everything that God created is potentially holy,
and our task as humans is to find that holiness in
seemingly unholy situations. When we can do this,
we will have learned to nurture our souls."

Rabbi Harold Kushner



'When we can do this'....(she says longingly).

Today I've mostly been eating...

Pagans! And very tasty they are too!! There's one on top of my diary!



PagEn's actually and they're cinamon rolls from IKEA provided by the lovely Stockings. How can we survive without the shop that brings us pagens and Skumm (sp? Can't remember!) - or in swedish 'Sweets'?!

Bob

When walking out in the snow earlier I was accompanied over the allotments by a little robin, flying from bough to bough keeping up with me...then as I got to the gate he flitted as quickly as he had fluttered into my wanderings.

I decided the robin is a perfect symbol for those people who do just that, appear and bring such joy, vibrance and companionship to your life but who then cease to be a part of it. I can think of so many 'friends' like this, who I am desperate to hold onto but have flown ahead into life - either theirs or mine.

I guess we really should let them go to brighten up someone else's journey, looking out for others who are with us for longer or at that time (something which is hard enough to do in and of itself) and just keep walking the path once brightened by their appearance.

Snow in Wing

It's been a heavenly day in the village today...white and magical. All quiet - hardly any of the neighbours left for work and the usual thunderous busses were absent at school time. The only sound was excitement from a steady stream of bundled up kids off to sledge and snowball. And I have joyfully passed the day watching all manner of busy birds feeding in the garden and enjoying an upstairs view of bounding dogs rejoicing over the scents in the park.

I finally got out for a walk at about 3ish and although the thaw had begun it was brilliant..still crunching underfoot, a kind of kaleidoscope effect on everything you looked at owing to the sun bouncing off every white surface.

As I walked I was mulling over a passage for a service I'm doing in a few weeks ...the transfiguration...where Jesus meets the prophets on a mountain. And where, so caught up in the spectacle, Peter the disciple asks if he should build three shelters for the holy men.

One commentator I read said we shouldn't get bogged down with this it was just a throw away remark but as I walked past a snowman with this in mind I wondered if we could learn something about man's need for permanence, need to build and mark out a place or moment or happening.

Snowmen, sandcastles, cairns, castles and careers we seem to need to say 'we are here'. I can't decide if we should take a tip from the Buddhists and say stop always thinking about the future, just 'be in the moment'. Afterall Peter is so keen to build, to think about the next stage, keen to be doing the right thing, wanting to take the right place within it all, he almost misses the action and the point. (As indeed we see in gethsemane and after the crucifixion).

If we took a more temporary approach, tried to see things from a view of one just passing through would we be better or worse at looking after our world and all it's inhabitants?

Or is it that we want to celebrate life, to say this is amazing and I am in the middle of it, I experienced this?

Either way it seems our focus isn't really on the snow/sand/God itself, what more would we get if we could leave ourselves out of the equation entirely, what else would we see/hear/feel?

Maybe nothing...maybe something, however transient. Thoughts?

(Found this great photo of a girl playing in snow in Wing! (Actually from 2005 but who's counting). It's by a village resident David Schweinsberg - Flickr is fab. So is his photostream.)

Food for eating.

I am a HUGE fan of Waitrose...it's got to be the most ethical supermarket (if that's not a total oxymoron) and it certainly has some fabulous produce, producers and a good take on provenance. Not to mention it's kept both my mother and brother off the streets, for which two communities, at least, are very grateful.

However, one of the best thing to come out of the hallowed portals of 'the mighty W' (as we fondly refer to it) is their freebie magazine 'Seasons'. With fewer so called 'advertorials' than other supermarket booklets it is crammed full of recipes and I've had great fun working my way through them over the last year.

Sausage and Chesnut Caserole, Blueberry and Almond Sponge Cake, Butternut Squash, Sage and Goats Cheese Risotto have all been particular favourites but last night we reached new culinary heights with Smoked Salmon, Pea and Wasabi Linguine. I have only one things to say. Try it!

Instructions:

Add 400g Waitrose Linguine to a pan of boiling water. Cook for 5 minutes, then add 100g frozen Waitrose Petits Pois and cook for a further 2 minutes. Drain the pasta and peas. Whisk 300ml half-fat crème fraîche and 1-2 tbsp Yutaka Japanese Wasabi Paste together in the pasta pan and return it to the heat. Add a 170g pack Waitrose Scottish Smoked Salmon Trimmings and the drained pasta and petits pois. Toss together until the salmon is opaque. Serve immediately with a crisp green salad and lemon wedges to squeeze over.

Food for thought

I have a problem with this book, it has one of the greatest opening paragraphs I've ever read...










'He stands at the glass looking out. The city spreads below
him, blanketed in foggy slumber. Low pressure. Clouds roll
over the hills, seeping out of cracks and crevices as if the
geography itself was sending smoke signals'.

Geography sending smoke signals ...how cool is that metaphor?!

But in my experience the title is a complete lie...it won't save your life, in fact it's likely to reduce your days. Why? the wretched front cover...it's all embossed and tactile, fabulous glossy colours it's so goo you could eat it. Everytime I pick it up I'm left screaming for krispy kremes. Not good for the waistline, cholesterol level, skin should I go on?

The book however, is great for the brain and imagination ... once you get inside the front cover!

Exhibitionist

Hah! See that got you interested. Well sorry for the disappointment this is actually a post about Sunday being the annual LCET exhibition and it was absolutely fantastic. It's always mind-blowing to see what has happened over the last year and a great way to review our work and catch up with the therapuetic team's output.

What amazed me is that we manage to produce such incredible displays and interactive demonstrations of our work, WE manage to produce this. Obviously we are all marvellous (and God does miracles, we're evidence enough of that) but I'm constantly amazed by LCET and all that we achieve.

Thinking along these lines I found this great quotation from Kabir, an Indian mystic....


'Inside this clay jug there are canyons and pine mountains
and the maker of canyons and pine mountains! All seven
oceans are inside and hundreds and millions of stars.
The acid that tests gold is there, and the one who judges
jewels. And the music from the strings noone touches,
and the source of all water. If you want the truth: friend,
listen, the Holy One whom I love is inside.'

Music

Was driving home from work after a pretty manic day last friday, when Friday I'm in Love by The Cure was played and it was...arrrhhh, like a musical sigh of relief. One of those songs that you know really well, it has so many memories and is so comfortble to listen to it's literally like the aural equivalent of putting your old slippers on but because you don't own it (no not even on vinyl!) it's also like unexpectedly being given a chocolate eclair (as I was at Ashcroft yesterday).

This all made me think it was kind of a song for my soul...a bit like chicken soup (ok I'll stop the comparisons now). This in turn made me think what other 15 tracks should be on that album?

My other fantasy (as yet) album is best duets of all time...these aren't they but they'd have to be in there...

1. Mark Knopfler and James Taylor - Mason Dixon Line
2. Willie Nelson and LeAnne Womack - Mendocino County Line
3. Kate Rusby and Ronan Keating - All Over Again (no I don't know why but it's damn catchy)
4. Sheryl Crow and Kid Rock - ?
5.
6.
7.
8.
9.
10.
11.

Any to add and I might just burn it?

Pur-leaseeeeeee!

OK so the 6 o'clock news is buzzing with the news...yes, you read correctly, news that big brother contestants have been bullying and name calling! It's taken people how many series to wake up to this?!

It's even going all the way to the commons...the BBC website reports this

'A row over remarks made to Celebrity Big Brother's Shilpa Shetty will be raised in Parliament after thousands of viewers complained to the TV watchdog. Leicester East MP Keith Vaz said he tabled the Early Day Motion after being contacted by his constituents. Almost 10,000 complaints have been received by both regulator Ofcom and Channel 4, which broadcasts the show. Mr Vaz said the motion, designed to raise matters of concern, emphasises the influence the show has on viewers'.

Now don't get me wrong racism of any kind is out of order, and I don't watch the show so I don't know what's been said but I did see Shilpa's agent interviewed and saying it wasn't racism, just bullying and Channel 4 says she hasn't (yet) complained about anything herself. It seems really sad that racism would be out of order, yet the appalling disrespect and disregard for any kind of common humanity frequently exhibited on the show is just fine.

I agree any racism should be taken very seriously indeed (and fear it won't be as it's great for ratings) but if we're talking about concern over the influence the show has on viewers, well Mr Vaz nothing like shutting the door after the horse has bolted...

Brilliance

Just getting over another LCET retreat...basically trying to shed some of the calories piled on over two days...and of course feeling really holy.

Devised and lead the chapel service on Wednesday night (with the lovely Mrs VDM), which illicted the adjectives "awesome", "excellent", and "brilliant" as well as the phrase "if only church was like that more often" from the supreme being, Chris Curtis...high praise indeed and I am feeling very smug ...whilst trying not to be proud!!

The service was based around the story of the fall and when I saw this was the lectionary reading my heart sank...what should we do with that? But I was also excited by the wealth of imagery in the story and the idea that we like Adam have been made guardians of life; to look after all that is around us and to help creation find it's identity. We found some great liturgy from Roots Worship that talked about God bursting our bubble when we forgot Him and thought and acted like god's ourselves. Obviously that called for bubbles (any excuse) and before everyone entered we put a plate outside with sliced apple on it and a sign that said 'have a taste'... glad to say most of the team were lead into temptation ;-).

We had a morning on the book of Jude which was good, we gardened for the monks which was a great way to give something back to them and during some of the free time we had I found a great book called something like 'Poetry for the spirit' and within it an absolutely mind boggling poem by RS Thomas...how you can say so much in so few words is beyond me (as many would testify). It's when faced with something like this that you can begin to understand the idea of genius, I think.

Kyrie (from Mass for Hard Times)

Because we cannot be clever and honest
And are inventors of things more intricate
Than the snowflake – Lord have mercy.

Because we are full of pride
In our humility, and because we believe
In our disbelief – Lord have mercy.

Because we will protect ourselves
From ourselves to the point
Of destroying ourselves – Lord have mercy.

And because on the slope to perfection,
When we should be halfway up
We are halfway down – Lord have mercy.

A new year offering!

For Tom...

Yes I agree. We'll pull ourselves together.
We eat too much, we're always getting pissed.
It's not a bad idea to find out whether
We like each other sober, let's resist.
I've got the Perrier and the carrot grater
I'll look on scotch or pudding as a crime.
We all have to be sensible sooner or later
But don't let's be sensible all the time.

No more thinking about a second bottle
And saying "what the hell" and giving in.
Tomorrow I'll be jogging at full throttle
To make myself successful, rich and thin.
A healthy life's a great rejuvenator
But God, it's going to be an uphill climb.
We all have to be sensible sooner or later
But don't let's be sensible all the time.

The conversation won't be half as trivial -
you'll hold forth on issues of the day -
And when the evenings aren't quite so convivial,
You'll start remembering the things I'll say.
"Oh see if you can the catch the eye of the waiter
And order me a double vodka and lime".
We all have to be sensible sooner or later
But I refuse to be sensible all the time.

The New Regime - Wendy Cope

A Happy Christmas!

Mr Flower and I decided to have Christmas at home - relative free for the firs time in our 10 years of being together and it was a wonderful day.

I have been reading Doing December Differently (after a tip off on Jonny Bakers blog) and it really helped to focus on the season, what it means and how it's not always easy or happy. It also helped me to slow down amidst all the manic-ness of getting ready and to really appreciate the day.

Out of thinking about the rituals that we create for ourselves I decided to have a rememberance candle, to light to remember those who were far away and those no longer with us...it really helped me include family who are so spread out and those who are always missing at this time. I included it with other decorations but we only lit it when we especially wanted to call someone to mind.



I was also reflecting on why the day was so peaceful and relaxed...we had cleaned, decorated, bought special food and drink, we had gone to church, sat down a lot, taken time over our meal. Now most of these things (Christmas tree notwithstanding) we do on any given sunday (because we're exceptionally blessed) but that never feels so calm. My Uncle says it was because we set out to relax, it was a mind thing and I guess that's the difference we were completely focused on having a special, soul spacious day and so we did. Am so going to try to do this at least twice a year.

Said Uncle also picked out this quote from a book I had been given "Man is ill because he is never still". After my forray into psychoneuroimmunology this year I think it speaks a lot of truth and it's a note to self as we look to January speeding round the tracks and the return to work. Then again not exactly surprised ... 'Be still and know that I am God'. That's the best one for perspective, health and happiness.

Discipline

Not my favourite subject but have decided it's where I'm at ...and so I am trying to do the lectionary readings daily (thanks to Mark Berry and Way Out West).
This morning's were Psalms 5, 6
1 Kings 1:32 to 2:4; and 2:10 to 12
Acts 13:44 to 14:7

Which reminded me of the lyrics to the Clash's Should I stay or should I go(...if I go there will be trouble, if I stay it will be double). We are called to God's mission and only by following his 'decrees and commands, laws and commandments' (Kings) can we know what we're supposed to be doing but also when it's time to leave it. Often walking away can be seen as defeat but maybe it's a sign of wisdom ... after all Jesus' parables leave room to walk away and here in Acts the apostles do it a number of times. We're called to 'wait in expectation' not 'flog a dead horse' or be 'like a dog with a bone' (to mixe my animal metaphors) and isn't that actually something about respect?!

Lord give us hearts not afraid to persevere but which know the right places to be and the right times to be there, help us walk closely with you so we can feel the difference.

Blogging

I am such a bad blogger - surpassed in lack of posts only by holy joely I think, although now he's a student with all that time on his hands (ha ha) anything could happen!

I have a list of blogs in my head and never seem to write them...

Yoga...I went to yoga on the common and it started a whole can yoga and christianity mix type debate...which got me into something called C4 contextualisation ("May the holy spirit be with you Luke!" - not! But might give you an idea, frantic semantics really!!). I also felt so close to God when doing it I was inspired to start thinking/developing some body prayer (don't worry liturgical dance it is not!!) ideas.

Religion in wider culture...Samsonite have a new range of bags called proverbs...each one has a proverb embossed on it... I have been getting my best spiritual challenges from outside of the church recently and more powerfully than I think anyone from 'within' has ever challenged me...what can we as church learn. On this note Michael Franti! Buy Yell Fire now! A lovely friend bought me a copy after I saw him at GB...wow.

Hear Me and Breath at Greenbelt....an awesome experience.

New term, new dreams....oh and I might be a pluralist.

Letters...one of my best friends wrote me a letter, yes remember those. It was brilliant, I miss them. She also celebrated, yeas celebrated my dinners in response to my previous rather paranoid blog but it felt so good and affirming to read those words...we really should encourage each other more. I feel I have alot of that with these people and am truly grateful!

Oh yeah, and having lunch with John Hurt.....well actually with my husband at the Wolsley (divine) but John was on the next table AND James Elroy was in ther house!!

So much life, so little time.

Roll up, roll up...

Had the most amazing Friday evening experience a couple of weeks ago. Went to the circus!

Wanted to blog straight away but still trying to digest it really. Have never been to one before and to be honest clowns scare the living daylights out of me and don't even get me onto the ethics of performing lions but I am so glad I waited because this was not just any circus this was Gifford's Circus!

It's like toy town with it circle of burgundy panted wagons and it's strings of fairy lights illuminating the big top...the costumes are a riot of colour and texture, with music, singing and stunts of such skill that every now and then you realise you need to breath ...everyone should go!

If ever something delivered what it promised Gifford's is the place...from the perfect candy floss to the wonderful three course meal we had under canvas in the Circus Sauce restaurant complete with Emma Drinkwater (sister of Nell Gifford) pottery and silver candlesticks!!

Heavenly.

Mysterious ways!

So just a day after my culinary paranoia I get an e-mail from my bro, who was with us for two weeks last month...thanking us for our hospitality which he said was "cool" and yes the dinner with the neighbours went so well we're off there for a bar-b-que asap!

Theology?

There were 3 good arguments that Jesus was Black
-he called everyone brother
-he liked gospel
-he couldn't get a fair trial

But then there were equally 3 good arguments that He was Jewish
-He went into his fathers business
-He lived at home until he was 33
-He was shure his mother was a virgin and his mother was sure he was God.

But then there were equally 3 good arguments that He was Italian
-He talked with His hands
-He had wine with His meals
-He used olive oil

But then there were equally 3 good arguments that He was Californian
-He never cut his hair
-He walked around barefoot all the time
-He started a new religion

But then there were equally 3 good arguments that He was an American Indian
-He was at peace with nature
-He ate a lot of fish
-He talked about the Great Spirit

But then there were equally 3 good arguments that He was Irish
-He never got married
-He was always telling stories
-He loved green pastures

But the most compelling evidence of all - 3 proofs that Jesus was a woman
-He fed a crowd at a moment's notice when there was no food
-He kept trying to get a message across to a bunch of men who just didn't get it.
-And even when He was dead He had to get up because there was work to be done.

Fine dining?!

Ok so we're having friends over to dinner...well neighbours actually and after fretting about whether they'd like what we served or if they'd be allergic to it (having recently caused wicked stepmother a night of agony with undetected dried skimmed milk powder) I finally got some sleep last night.

It's just that recently two comments have been on my mind...a colleague remarked that our home was an 'homage to Conran' and some lovely (and nameless) member of my family said we 'always over complicate things, why can't you just have dinner?!'. This combined with the beautifully, precisely laid table that I came down to this morning had me in a bit of a state that our pasta should be seen as pretentious, our omlettes ostentatious, and our suppers snobbish.

Now I love 'nice things' and 'nice events' and I make no apologies for that but (hopefully) anyone who knows me would say I am nothing but practical (no false nails or stili's for this chick) and really not into doing things just for show but the thought that I have turned my home into some chichi design emporium, where style has overtaken substance is eating me up.

I do however, want the best for those who are kind enough to come and share my home, I want them to have time out, recharge, feel that life is special and yes, maybe feel a little bit spoilt. Even just typing that last statement makes me embarressed, why? Why are we so puritantical at times? I want to be like the woman washing Jesus' feet with perfume, I'm sure when she wasn't watching her purse strings as a responsible kingdom citizen should, she was a cream cake, full fat latte kinda girl! Right?!

Blog browsing!

Found this on the blog I discovered yesterday, www.youthblog.org/2006/05/faithful_cities.html interesting news for those of us trying to discern what the future may hold for youthwork and has got me even more excited about the LCET Schoolswork Conference ...

There is such good stuff out there too, always enjoy www.maybe.org.uk and Jonny Baker has a new site www.dekhomai.co.uk a great bridge to Christian spirituality for those into all things alternative, have already directed friends there and only found it an hour ago...as ever the Grace crew are right on the button.

The only problem is everytime I do a swoop my dreams and my reading wish list get longer!!!

Great new blog!

Found a great new blog whilst looking for something entirely different! It's www.youthblog.org and it's got some great stuff on. Am a bit miffed because the author blogged on Robbie's song Sin, Sin, Sin beating me to it and the awesome Kenda Creasy Dean conference beating me to it! But hey great minds and all that!! As ever with blogs some wheat and chaff depending on whether you know the bloggers identity but some useful info too...'Faithful cities' report and Romance Academy conference dates so check it out!!