A new year offering!

For Tom...

Yes I agree. We'll pull ourselves together.
We eat too much, we're always getting pissed.
It's not a bad idea to find out whether
We like each other sober, let's resist.
I've got the Perrier and the carrot grater
I'll look on scotch or pudding as a crime.
We all have to be sensible sooner or later
But don't let's be sensible all the time.

No more thinking about a second bottle
And saying "what the hell" and giving in.
Tomorrow I'll be jogging at full throttle
To make myself successful, rich and thin.
A healthy life's a great rejuvenator
But God, it's going to be an uphill climb.
We all have to be sensible sooner or later
But don't let's be sensible all the time.

The conversation won't be half as trivial -
you'll hold forth on issues of the day -
And when the evenings aren't quite so convivial,
You'll start remembering the things I'll say.
"Oh see if you can the catch the eye of the waiter
And order me a double vodka and lime".
We all have to be sensible sooner or later
But I refuse to be sensible all the time.

The New Regime - Wendy Cope